Rabbit Holes

In the past I thought that my mind had an unlimited ability to create new terrors.  I could clear one, but another would pop up in an endless game of  terror Whac-a-mole. What if all of my businesses simultaneously burn down? What if I run out of money? What if I get dementia? What if I get old and smell like an old person, but I can’t tell? What if I get diabetes and lose my foot? 

One at a time, I found the thinking that allowed me to release these fears and I developed real skill at clearing them.  I learned to remind myself that, not only had my worst projections never happened, most of them turned out to bring me exactly what I wanted. Terror creation slowed down and now it has almost stopped. Maybe, in the face of my ability to vanish them, they gave up. I seldom dive down the “what if” rabbit holes anymore. 

I’m grateful to have this skill. In hindsight, a more direct route might have been to pray this prayer:

All That Is:  please fill in my rabbit holes—I’ve spent enough time spinning in the darkness. 

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